I must admit that I am feeling so much better these days...it has continued, which feels like a miracle. Again, is it the lovely Wellbutrin (i sound like a commercial) or is it exercising. I have realized that my messed up work schedule does mess with my moods...how so? Well, it messes up my sleep..it is impossible to get on a consistent sleep pattern...and when Jessica doesn't get sleep...I am grumpy and unproductive. And poor Kaden doesn't have any clue as to when he is suppose to sleep. I mean really, I have to get up at 6:30 both days this weekend...hello? ...not impossible, but not a pleasant thing for me..or those around me..haha.

You know what is strange. In general, I feel that I am good at reading people..sensing what they are feeling..where they are meaning comments to go..what is under the surface...this is in most interactions. Where it fails me miserably is matters of the heart. I do not trust my instincts at all when I have feelings for someone..sometimes I feel crazy because I feel like I sense the reciprocal feelings..yet chances are it might not be there. I am simply saying when it comes to my romantic feelings and interaction, I often find myself aimlessly searching through a dark room questioning what I am really feeling in front of me (and no..that is not meant to be a dirty joke). Don't you worry..i assure you the love life remain MIA...just deep thoughts with Jessica being shared.

Right now I feel directionless. Do I look for another job? Do I pursue photography? Do I consider moving? Is my love going to drop out of the sky? Do I stay or do I go? To be or not to be that is the question. O.k. now I am just saying anything..time for bed.